28 Lessons I've Learned in 28 Years
Yes, I'm pretty much Ghandi after this post.
I’ve seen a lot of ‘what i’ve learned in X years’ style content pop up across my socials lately. And I have to say I'm hooked, each time stopping my endless scrolling to engage & see what I can glean. I love that no matter who it is - young, old, disgustingly wealthy, a self-starting entrepreneur, an off-grid hippie type - I find there’s always something valuable to take.
And so I wanted to share my takes. Of course, we’re constantly evolving & growing, and some of these lessons may grow to be redundant with more life experience (probably not though because i’m sooo wise beyond my years). But for now, here’s what I have to share from my 28 laps around the Sun…
Be silly at every given opportunity. Adulthood sucks, embrace your inner child & surround yourself with people who bring it out of you.
Always tell someone something nice you’ve thought / noticed about them. Think they’ve lost weight? Think their hair has grown? Think they’re glowing? Tell them. It’s not cringe. It will always make someone’s day to hear something lovely, unexpected.
There will always be something about your appearance you will want to change. Striving for an appearance based goal is fine & you should absolutely go for it (healthily). But it’s powerful to realize that even when you should reach that goal there will be another thing waiting to take its place in order for you to feel more attractive. I’m still not sure how to change this, so I just accept it (thank you Isabelle for this uncomfortable realisation)
Ask your friends if they’re ok, even when it feels uncomfortable. Pry. Break through any defences. Think how many times you’ve wished someone would push a little further, & really see & understand what you’re feeling.
Cherish your girlfriends & make sure they know how valued they are. Celebrate their wins, make a big deal out of the small things, hype up their pics on Insta. To any men reading this, I'm sorry, you really will never know love like this.
Have a predisposition to listen, not fix. Sometimes all it takes is acknowledging how shitty a situation is for someone & nothing more.
Envy is normal. How you carry it matters. Accept it, learn what it is you deep down admire/want that said person has & go get it for yourself.
If it’s too heavy, sleep.
Be vulnerable. It’s fucking powerful.
Be curious, always.
Listen to the cheesy songs, on repeat, full blast. Have no shame. My go to’s are the Hannah Montana soundtrack, Hairspray & High School Musical (#gowildcats)
Dance & sing to said cheesy songs, often.
Accept that sometimes it is better to admit you walked through the wrong door than to spend your life in the wrong room. When I saw this quote online, I found it so freeing. Too often we let our ego get in the way of making decisions that are better for us.
Remember, everyone is focused on their own insecurities, not yours. Even if you come up in conversation, it won’t be for long.
Be patient with your friends who are in relationships they shouldn’t be. To love someone & know you should leave them is an impossible situation. Don’t underestimate it. Nudge gently, they will get there.
The mental health benefits of a Diet Coke cannot & should not be underestimated.
Practicing being grateful really does work. Do it.
Write it down. Get it down on paper.
Mind-map mid-big life decisions.
If you don’t love it, don’t buy it (for the more spenny purchase decisions at least).
Analyze boys, but don’t give them too much credit. Make up elaborate scenarios about boy’s motivations with your girlfriends over wine & analyze what their words/actions (or bloody inactions) mean until the cows come home. It’s fun & I live for it! But remember, there’s probably not a thought behind their eyes deep down.
Leave London often. Get out of there & breathe.
Pale girlies - put the factor 20 & 30 down. Just use factor 50. You aren’t olive skinned ‘with enough time’. This is a tough one to write, but use fake tan & expose yourself slowly.
Invest in good jewelery.
Cry it out. Sob if you need to. Doing it just before bed often results in a great night’s sleep.
Think like a man. Remember, for every woman that’s finishing up her day in corporate, worrying about how good of a job she did, there’s a mediocre man about to get on the tube, thinking he absolutely smashed it.
Sweat it out, often.
Celebrate as much as possible. From the big moments to the small ones. Make a big deal out of it. There’s so much to feel miserable & anxious about. Celebrate the wins.
& to little old me, we turned out pretty wise I’d say xo
